Sunday, January 16, 2011

Encyclopedia of Mollie: A

I came across a recent post from Shannanigans, titled "Encyclopedia of Moi: Volume A".
Her goal: every two weeks write one Letter volume, and by the end of  year, she'll have a whole encyclopedia about her. How cute! Imma do it!

The Encyclopedia of Mollie


"The view that the truth value of certain claims—especially claims about the existence or non-existence of any deity, but also other religious and metaphysicalclaims—is unknown or unknowable. Agnosticism can be defined in various ways, and is sometimes used to indicate doubt or a skeptical approach to questions. In some senses, agnosticism is a stance about the similarities or differences between belief and knowledge, rather than about any specific claim or belief" (Wikipedia).
It's taken a long time, but I think I have settled on my answer to the "great question" . . . Whatever. Seriously. Whatever you think, whatever works for you, whatever floats your boat. And you have no idea how much that BOTHERS PEOPLE!!!! Because, really, who am I to say what happens to YOU when you die -- I don't know you, I don't know your God. My thought is that it's just as insulting for me to tell you what I think will happen to YOU as it is for YOU to tell ME what will happen to ME (did you follow that?). It's like in politics: what right does a senator or the president have to tell me what I can do with my body? It's not HIS body, is it? So, what right do I have to tell someone else what to do with their soul? So, my thought is that the answers are truly unknowable, because I'm not you and you're not me, so how could I possibly know what happens to your soul, and therefore everyone's soul? If I can't know what happens to your soul, it's likely that something different happens to everyone's soul. So if you think you're going to heaven, you'll go to heaven; if you think you're going to be worm food, you'll be worm food; if you think you'll come back, you'll come back. It's just simpler that way. No one gets mad, everyone gets what they want.


I do enjoy being amazed by things. I used to write letters to my friend from college -- the only person to whom I write hand-written letters. I often "do the numbers" in these letters, e.g. "Number of times went to gym: 3; number of mochas consumed this week: 2, down from 6, which is good." I sometimes would include an item such as "Number of times amazed by my kids" ("my kids" being the kids for whom I nannied the year between college and grad school). I loved being astounded by them (another great A word), and I found that it made my days better when I stopped to notice it. I try to take a moment be amazed every day, thought I don't write it down as much as I should. For example, today I am amazed that my baby is supposedly the size of an eggplant, and amazed that my body has somehow found room for said eggplant, because I can't wrap my head around where it's finding the space (I try NOT to think about how it's pushing my other organs out of the way, because that's just a little too weird). What will amaze me tomorrow? . . .

I seriously don't buy anything without first checking I'd say it's in the top 10 greatest inventions of the last century. It's like going to the mall, without dealing with people. And you're allowed to take things with you from store to store and compare, and then leave your shopping cart there, full of stuff, until you're ready to come back and pay for it.
Recent example of how Amazon is the greatest: last week C and I were in Best Buy, picking up our new TV (Merry Christmas from Dad!), and he says to me, "Oh, we need a few HDMI cables. Like a 3' and a 6'." So while he waited for the guy to bring out the TV and put it in the car, I wandered over to the electronics section to find the cables. I was astounded by how expensive they were! $30-$50 for the 3' cable! Up to $90 for the 6'! That can't be right!!! So I whip out my trusty iPhone, which happens to hold my trusty App. (Mrs. Kinne knows the joy I find in my App. For some reason, every time we get together, I tell her all about it, forgetting that I've already told her all about it. She's a good sport though, and often pretends to be hearing it for the first time.) So I look up HDMI cables, and see them on sale for between $5 and $10. I even look up the fancy, name-brand ones, and still they're under $20. I go back up to the front of the store and ask C, "Do we need these in order to use this TV today?" "No," he says. "We're buying them on Amazon," I say. C is not surprised.
I also have an VISA credit card, which gives me poinst towards Amazon gift cards. This year I had a stroke of good luck, in that I paid all my bills and paid for my new bed on my Amazon card, had like $100 in gift cards, and didn't buy anyone their Christmas presents on Amazon. So I had the gift cards all to myself when I birthday rolled around. Free Wii Fit for Mollie! Happy Birthday to ME!
It is also coming in quite handy as I do my baby registry. Babies R Us may be the leader in all things baby, but their website sucks. I mean SUCKS!!!! It doesn't tell you things like the size of the nipple that comes with this bottle, or "here are the things that you need to buy along with this crib". Amazon does. So, sorry to all the traditional people who like to go into stores and buy things and watch me open them at baby showers; a lot of the good stuff is on the Amazon list.

Amigurumi (みぐるみ):

"The Japanese art of knitting or crocheting small stuffed animals and anthropomorphic creatures. The word is derived from a combination of the Japanese words ami, meaning crocheted or knitted, and nuigurumi, meaning stuffed doll. Amigurumi are typically animals, but can include artistic renderings or inanimate objects endowed with anthropomorphic features" (Wikipedia).
I've just started to "officially" learn to make these, though I've been known to knit caricatures of some famous people.
Knitted Barack Obama    Knitted Michael Phelps (4)
But Amis are just so adorable! They're all round and wide-eyed! I started with animals . . .
Barney Ornament  Crochet Puggy
. . . and hope to work my way up to real characters and people. I think my nursery could use some hand-made pooh.


Ok, I really don't want to love this show as much as I do. It's so crass. No, it's more than crass. It's downright put-my-head-in-my-hands-and-pray-for-forgiveness-for-laughing-at-something-so-inappropriate FUNNY!

Favorite Quote:
"She doesn't let me wear a condom!"
"Don't you want grandkids someday?"
"Well, if I did, I'd just scrape all your previous mishaps into a big pile and knit a onesie for it."

Volume B -->


MrsKinne said...

Yay! I love that you are doing this! :)

Shannon said...

Heyyyy there, thanks for playing along! I was kinda worried I'd look like a loser if no one did ;) But your list is awesome. First, i love the little girl/holy shit image. I want to post that everywhere. Second, congrats on the babe! If you can't believe it's an eggplant now, wait til he or she pops out. I think that's the biggest amazement of all. Third, I need to watch Archer. I'm pretty sure it's on FX, which is the home to my 2 favorite shows, so I'd probably like it.